Sunbeams on Bibles

Hollis Kincade

Jul 31

5 min read

Sunlight filtering through leafy orchard trees

The last two months have been

very overwhelming.

In good way and in hard ways.

At the end of May, I found out some roots to a variety of health issues I have lived with for years.

It was both relieving and heartbreaking to hear the reasons why. I do not accept diagnosis's as mark on my life. However, it does shift my lifestyle some while I heal!

So, instead of saying how it looks on paper, I will title the roots by what I am working with the Lord and my doctor to heal.

I am currently working on healing:

Severe Adrenal Fatigue
Candida overgrowth
Hormone imbalances causing me to go into Perimenopause in my early 30's.
Moderately Severe Depression
Low Iron
Insulin Sensitivity (Monitoring closely due to a family history of Diabetes)

Basically, I am starting my days with lower Cortisol levels than healthy individuals have during REM sleep.

Due to all the above, my diet has drastically shifted, bringing a whole different level of inconvenience in addition to being Gluten free.

My husband has been such an amazing support in all of this with my emotions, extreme fatigue, hormonal swings due to rare side effects from HRT (I'll spare you the details) and a total shift in what I can eat. He has been my absolute rock.

I have bloodwork in few weeks that will help further determine the correct course of action for my body moving forward.

In the meantime, I am enjoying eating strictly Paleo, mornings in the sun to help my hormones, walks and rides on our stationary bike (Thank you Thrift store) to help keep my energy levels up.

Speaking of my husband- allow me a moment to brag about him!

He has been tirelessly working on a job with our business that has required him to work 10-12 hour days 6 days a week. Yet, he still manages to help or fully cook dinner when I am completely spent, make the family time we do have a priority and has continuously encouraged me to keep going on this Author journey. I could keep going on and on about how heavy his burdens are lately... But I'll stop here!

Cover Prototype for work-in-progress debut novel. Nothing about this image may be used or recreated without direct permission from the Creator, Hollis Kincade.

The Story behind the BOOK TITLE!

This last month, I released a reel on my Instagram page that revealed the Title of my Work-in-Progress book! The Cover is only a prototype- I have plans to make it my own! However, the title will not change.

The first time my husband confessed to loving me, I challenged him with, "I love you more." He quickly replied, "I love you most." we continued this competition until I said, "I love you with all I am." I was convinced I had won. Yet, without missing a beat, he said, "And all I'll ever be."

He won the competition and I swooned! Over the last 15 years, it has been our constant saying to each other.

I had a different title chosen. But as I wrote it didn't seem to fit. Then, one day on a drive, while I held my husbands hand from the passenger seat and asked, "Babe? What if my books title was "And All I Will Ever Be"?" He teared up immediately as he moved my hand upwards to kiss the top of my hand. He softly whispered, "It's us. It's perfect."

The Main Characters, Hank and Alice, are based on me and my husband. So, a title that is specifically us is exactly why my first working title didn't fit.

Writing Update:

I have reached chapter 5 in my work-in-progress. It has come to my attention that creating a story with a historical culture must change how the main characters interact. I have done a lot of deep dives into researching the 1920'a era, how two young people would begin a relationship traditionally and how they could showcase their peaking interests in a way that was socially appropriate for the times. It has been more difficult than I anticipated! There doesn't appear to be many resources for coverage of the 1920's. I have resorted to scouring antiques stores for anything and everything from the era. Recently, I found a National Geographic Magazine published in 1915, miscellaneous photos dated in the 1920's, a school curriculum book for Palmer Method cursive writing as well as a book of sheet music for lullaby's. I am trying to get my hands on anything that I can use as references for historical accuracy within my fictional story.

I am working very hard to just get the story typed out, allowing it to be simply "word vomit". But, overthinking has been a nemesis!

Betrayal Recovery and Writing:

The slow pace of writing has given me time to reflect on the layers of our story. I have been open on my social media about all that God is revealing, teaching and healing in my heart. So, I will here as well while maintaining the boundary that I will not post anything that is not fully healed.

Writing how my main characters interact (At this point the beginning of attraction and friendship) has revealed to me that the years of marital betrayal has left many wounds. I have worked for 10 years on these with God's mericful kindness revealing hurts layer by layer. Theother day I felt this anxious urge to rewrite everything about the main male character, Hank. Since he is based off my husband (though not a direct copy) I found myself wanting to remove the parts of the character- Specifically the way he interacts with Alice (my character though not a direct copy).

I asked myself why, prayed through the emergent emotions flaring and recognized a hurt that was buried deep, deep down.

I believe that this revelation is God placing his hand on an area of my heart that still needs the power of the hem of His Garment.

I am proceeding slowly with surrender. I pray that my book honors the Lord and the miracle of His everlasting faithfulness above all else!

Work-in-Progress Sneak Peek:

Ready for a behind the cover of the first draft?

"Alice eyebrows furrowed, her head tilted to the right.

"Oh. Um. No, I haven't. I want to! But, I am not good at approaching people..."

"Yes, you are, Lady! You had no problem introducing yourself to me!"

I wish I had never done that...

Alice pressed her palm against her warmed cheeks, while she took a sudden interest in the blades of grass beneath her shoes.

Hank ducked down, bobbing his head into her line of sight until her eyes met his.

"I'm glad you did, Alice. Really glad," He said as he winked.

Hank let out let out a sharp breath while he ran his fingers through his hair before burying his hands deep into his suit jacket pockets."